Government Run Amok

Abbott and Costello – Who’s Out of Work?

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This is an update on Abbott & Costello’s famous “Who’s on First?” routine updated to show the lunacy of the Government’s method of calculating Unemployment Numbers. The original skit follows.

Abbott_CostelloCOSTELLO:  I want to talk about the unemployment rate in America  .

ABBOTT: Good Subject.  Terrible Times.  It’s 5.6%.

COSTELLO:  That many people are out of work?

ABBOTT: No, that’s 23%.

COSTELLO: You just said 5.6%.

ABBOTT:  5.6% Unemployed.

COSTELLO:  Right 5.6% out of work.

ABBOTT: No, that’s 23%.

COSTELLO: Okay, so it’s  23% unemployed.

ABBOTT: No, that’s 5.6%.

COSTELLO:  WAIT A MINUTE. Is it 5.6% or 23%?

ABBOTT: 5.6% are unemployed.  23% are out of work.

COSTELLO: If you are out of work you are unemployed.

ABBOTT:  No, Obama said you can’t count the “Out of Work” as the unemployed.  You have to look for work to be unemployed.

COSTELLO: BUT THEY ARE OUT OF WORK!!!

ABBOTT: No, you miss his point.

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Jeff Foxworthy Rant – They Must Be Idiots

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Attributed to Jeff Foxworthy (yeah, the “You Might be a Redneck” if guy):

If plastic water bottles are okay, but plastic bags are banned, — you might live in a nation (state) that was founded by geniuses but is run by idiots.

WE DO LIVE IN SUCH A DUMB COUNTRY!!

If you can get arrested for hunting or fishing without a license, but not for entering and remaining in the country illegally — you might live in a nation that was founded by geniuses but is run by idiots.

Smokey_Bear_Prevent_Big_GovtIf you have to get your parents’ permission to go on a field trip or to take an aspirin in school, but not to get an abortion — you might live in a nation that was founded by geniuses but is run by idiots.

If you MUST show your identification to board an airplane, cash a check, buy liquor, or check out a library book and rent a video, but not to vote for who runs the government — you might live in a nation that was founded by geniuses but is run by idiots.

If the government wants to prevent stable, law-abiding citizens from owning gun magazines that hold more than ten rounds, but gives twenty F-16 fighter jets to the crazy new leaders in Egypt — you might live in a nation that was founded by geniuses but is run by idiots.

If, in the nation’s largest city, you can buy two 16-ounce sodas, but not one 24-ounce soda, because 24-ounces of a sugary drink might make you fat — you might live in a nation that was founded by geniuses but is run by idiots.

If an 80-year-old woman who is confined to a wheelchair or a three-year-old girl can be strip-searched by the TSA at the airport, but a woman in a burka or a hijab is only subject to having her neck and head searched — you might live in a nation that was founded by geniuses but is run by idiots.

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