‘Fifty Shades Of Hay’ Starring ‘Tampon’ Tim Walz

That Liberal Women Think Tim Walz Is Sexy Tells You All You Need To Know About Liberal Women

Daily Caller–Maybe he’s born with it. Maybe it’s Marxism?

Yes, a horde of liberal women have now inexplicably found their dream man: Minnesota Governor and walking-dad-joke Tim Walz.

Comedian Chelsea Handler called him a “cutie-patootie” and said it would be “hot” if he brought her tampons.

Comic Julia Sweeney declared a “political crush” on Walz after seeing his charisma on TV. Many commentators, including ESPN’s Mina Kimes, have gushed about the “really powerful” way that Walz is “modeling a different kind of masculinity.” Others projected their daddy issues onto him. Some viral Twitter randos have even called him a “sexy grandpa” and openly fantasized about what sex with him would be like. I’ll spare you the details, though.

‘Grandfatherly’ Governor Tim Walz Orders Police To Shoot Porchsitters With Paintballs During COVID Emergency

‘Light ‘em up!’: Police shoot paintballs at Minneapolis residents standing on their porch

Independent–Police officers and National Guard forces in Minneapolis shot paintballs at residents standing outside on their porch, as a curfew was enforced throughout the city.

A video posted on Twitter on Saturday night appears to show the Minnesota National Guard and state police ordering the residents of one street to go inside, before they turn their weapons on a group of residents.

The footage captures people rushing inside the property after shots are fired and shows where one member of the public has been hit by a paintball.

Armed officers can be heard shouting “light ‘em up” before the shots start.