Hillary’s Latest Polling Problem

Hillary Clinton’s book, “What Happened” was purported to be the definitive analysis of her election loss to now President, Donald J. Trump.  However, we feel this latest poll most accurately sums up Ms. Clinton’s electability issues.  Tune back in tomorrow when we answer the question “Would you rather have dinner with Hillary Clinton or Jeffrey Dahmer?”

Trump Plans Outreach to Rocky Horror Picture Show Fans

President Trump, already planning his next State Visit itinerary, told reporters aboard Air Force One during today’s flight home, that building a “Great Relationship” with Transylvania is topmost on his list.  He vows to keep working until even Susan Sarandon and Meat Loaf agree to vote for him in 2020.  Mr. Trump hopes that Janet and Eddie will lead the first wave of Rocky Horror Picture Show voters.  He plans to have the pair introduce his new campaign slogan – “Rocky the Vote”.

“Rocky Horror Picture Show” – Trailer

Hurricane ‘Irma’ Advice For Floridians

From the Miami Herald, “Irma becomes strongest Atlantic hurricane outside Gulf and Caribbean ever recorded“.

Irma spun into a monster storm Tuesday morning with sustained winds topping 180 mph, becoming the strongest Atlantic hurricane ever recorded outside the Gulf of Mexico and Caribbean, National Hurricane Center forecasters said in their 11 a.m. advisory.

Do to the bigly strength of the winds, the Weather Service offers this additional warning.

**Almost FakeNews Alert

FakeNews CNN – All the News That’s Fit For the Crapper

FakeNews CNN premiered their new mobile “News Station” at the Coos Bay, Oregon 4th of July/Northern Spotted Owl Lives Combined Celebratory Event.  CNN’s President, Jeff Zucker, wanted to field test some new slogans with some low information, uncritical, lefty Liberal viewers before unveiling them prime time.  Amongst the contenders,  “Our News Wipes Fox New’s Ass”, “All the News That’s Fit For the Crapper”, and Jeff’s very ownliest favorite, “Holy Crap, We’re All Gonna Die.”

How Bernie Sanders Used His Extra Cash

As CBS News reports, “Bernie and Jane Sanders, under FBI investigation for bank fraud, hire lawyers“.  We may now have an idea what Bernie and Jane did with all that cash.

Bernie and Jane’s New Ride

Politico Magazine first reported the Sanders had hired lawyers to defend them in the probe. Sanders’ top adviser Jeff Weaver told CBS News the couple has sought legal protection over federal agents’ allegations from a January 2016 complaint accusing then-President of Burlington College, Ms. Sanders, of distorting donor levels in a 2010 loan application for $10 million from People’s United Bank to purchase 33 acres of land for the institution.

According to Politico, prosecutors might also be looking into allegations that Sen. Sanders’ office inappropriately urged the bank to approve the loan.

I can see it now. Bernie and Jane on the run in their new ride.  The Chambers Brothers playing  at full volume and Bernie shouting,”Give it some more cowbell, Janie”.

Now the time has come
Nowhere (place) to run
Might get burned up by the sun
But I’ll have my fun
I’ve been loved, pushed (put) aside
I’ve been crushed by tumbling tide
And my soul has been psychedelicized

The Chambers Brothers – “Time Has Come Today”

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