Daily Darwin – Anything For Love Genome

Darwin is virtually speechless when confronted with an example of the “I’ll do anything for love genome”. He remarks that the outbreak usually occurs only once.

Natural selection deems that some individuals serve as a warning to others. Who are we to disagree? The next generation, ever and anon, is descended from the survivors

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Daily Darwin – Key Cleaner Award

Darwin chortles about the most recent April Fools prank going around.  He surmises that the unwitting fools got quite a shock to the old genomes when they inserted their keys into the ‘key cleaning machine’.

Natural selection deems that some individuals serve as a warning to others. Who are we to disagree? The next generation, ever and anon, is descended from the survivors

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Daily Darwin – My Flaming Ding-A-Ling

Darwin gleefully notes that this fine specimen appears to be exhibiting a major case of “Genome Impairment due to a Flaming and Exploding Ding-A-Ling” thingy. Darwin further states, that if left untreated, all that will be left of said genomes will be burnt out husks. You can watch the flambe act while enjoying Chuck Berry expounding on the “Ding-A-Ling” phenomenon.

Chuck Berry – “My Ding-A-Ling”

Natural selection deems that some individuals serve as a warning to others. Who are we to disagree? The next generation, ever and anon, is descended from the survivors

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Daily Darwin – Social Justice Warrior Flambes Genomes

Darwin duly notes that SJW’s tend not to be the ‘brightest candles on the cake’.  He points out that this genius was a ‘few clowns short of a circus’ when he decided throwing a flaming bottle of flammables was a good idea.   One could say the SJW’s ‘logs were ablaze but the chimney was clogged’. And furthermore, Darwin says noting the cracking sounds of genomes roasting, this Social Justice Warrior was definitely ‘a few burgers short of a barbecue’.

Darwin theorizes that most of these SJW Rocket Scientists are ‘all booster and no payload’.  He says most of them ‘couldn’t hit a target with an atomic bomb’ or much less ‘blow their noses even if brains were dynamite’.  As for the genome question itself, Darwin hypothesizes that this SJW shish kebab’s ‘brother was an only child’.

Natural selection deems that some individuals serve as a warning to others. Who are we to disagree? The next generation, ever and anon, is descended from the survivors

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Daily Darwin – Hey Guys! Take The New ‘Firecracker Challege’

Darwin, while rolling on the floor laughing his ass off, says guys, really? You’re actually going to place explosives next to your ‘ownliest’ genome jewels and then explode them. The explosives, that is. And obviously your jewels too. You know the ones that are parked right next to the explosive. You know it’s not going to work out well, right? But the ‘clicks’ are worth it? OK, then. Whatever lights your fire. You will definitely not be polluting the old gene pool.  How do you spell eunuch? E U N U C H.  What’s that spell? Y O U.

Natural selection deems that some individuals serve as a warning to others. Who are we to disagree? The next generation, ever and anon, is descended from the survivors

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Ruh-Roh Charlie Darwin – Your Newest Candidate Just ‘Beat Feet’

It appears that this candidate for one of Charlie Darwin’s Awards may have walked away before getting his award. Better luck delivering next time, Charlie.  And you know there will be a next time, because they just never learn.

**Tire tracks in – hole in the ice – footprints out. Ohhh yeahhh???

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Daily Darwin – Girder Dolly Dump

Darwin in quick to point out that he definitely sympathizes with anyone that doesn’t want to risk their ‘ownliest’ genomes by passing logging trucks or Bridge Beam Haulers. Here’s one example where “to hesitate is not to lose.”

Natural selection deems that some individuals serve as a warning to others. Who are we to disagree? The next generation, ever and anon, is descended from the survivors

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Daily Darwin – Darwin’s Home Builder Brigade

Darwin points out that he has finally found out where members of his infamous ‘Ladder Brigade’ park their genomes for the night. His initial thought on learning, “Whoa, that first step is a real bitch”.

Natural selection deems that some individuals serve as a warning to others. Who are we to disagree? The next generation, ever and anon, is descended from the survivors

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Daily Darwin – The POD People Genome

Darwin gags (heh) down a chortle as he notes that the current rage of eating Tide PODS as a gag (heh, heh) is going to end up washing (heh, heh, heh) the perpetrators genomes right out of the old gene pool.

Natural selection deems that some individuals serve as a warning to others. Who are we to disagree? The next generation, ever and anon, is descended from the survivors

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Climate Change Changes Are For ‘Pee-ons’ Say Davos Elite

“Rules for Thee, but Not for Me”, was the watchword on the tarmac as “A Thousand Private Jets Deliver Globalist Elite to Davos for Climate Change Summit.” Breitbart reports the “irony” of using private jets to attend an AGW-Climate Change-Global Warming (AKA: Weather) conference in the snow.  One is left with the notion that nobody is going to mess with their “Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous over a little carbon emission.  They’ll just go to the “Carbon Offset” store and buy a tree, or some “Indulgences“.

More than 1,000 private jet flights have been delivering globalist elites to the World Economic Forum (WEF) in Davos, where attendees are discussing — among other topics — the ‘major threat’ of climate change.
Airports around the Swiss ski resort will see the number of private jets spike 335 per cent during the annual meeting of world elites, according to Air Charter Service (ACS).

**Disclaimer-If you click on the “Carbon Offset” link and decide that it might be a good idea get you some of those Offset things  to “save the planet”, then you might be one of the stupidest fuckers to ever walk the planet.  It’s inevitable that you’ll chlorinate your own gene pool by doing something so grotesquely idiotic as taking the “Tide Pod Challenge” or some other numbnuts thing.  So do us all a favor and stick your head in an oven filled with ‘dinosaur farts‘ and help keep your genomes from diluting our gene pool.

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Daily Darwin – Electrician Ladder Brigade Two-fer

Darwin hilariously points out that this Darwin Award candidate belongs to the rarefied category of ‘Two-fers’, those that seek to wreck havoc on their genomes in two ways simultaneously. In this case, by Ladder and by Electricity.

Natural selection deems that some individuals serve as a warning to others. Who are we to disagree? The next generation, ever and anon, is descended from the survivors

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Daily Darwin – The Naked Motocross Genome

Darwin does his best facepalm as he asks, “Why would anyone think that a ‘Naked Motocross’ event was any kind of good idea.  There’s nothing like 40 miles of sun, sand, sagebrush, snakes, insects, pot holes and friction to make the old genomes say “Nope”.  Hmmm??  Darwin posits.  Maybe that’s why the race is called an “Enduroid“.

Natural selection deems that some individuals serve as a warning to others. Who are we to disagree? The next generation, ever and anon, is descended from the survivors

Despicable_Minions_300x136_animated

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