So How Hot Did It Get In Portland, Johnny?

It got so hot that even the Ice Cream truck melted…

The Oregonian–Portland hit 116 degrees Monday afternoon, setting a new record high temperature for the third day in a row, according to the National Weather Service.

The high temperature at Portland International Airport had reached 116 degrees just after 5 p.m., surpassing the high of 114 that forecasters had predicted.

Monday’s record-setting temperatures broke Sunday’s record-setting high of 112 degrees. Sunday’s high had broken the 108 degree-record set Saturday, which broke the previous high of 107, first set in 1965.

And what’s worse, it got so hot that Momma’s dress started doing that ‘processed cheese food’ thing–no Rotel necessary.

 

 

AGW – How Cold Is It, Johnny?

“Well, Ed. It’s cold enough to freeze the balls off of a snowman.”

*It was so cold, the politicians had their hands in their own pockets.

*Last night, it was so cold, the flashers in New York were only describing themselves.

*It’s so cold I had to break the smoke off my chimney.

*It’s so cold my balls have become ovaries!

*It’s so cold Dunkin’ Donuts is serving coffee on a stick.

*It’s so cold I had to chisel my dog off a fire hydrant.

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