Here’s a suggestion for what to get your Liberal Democratic friends and relatives who just can’t get over Donald Trump’s victory.
#Snowflakes
Civil War – Snowflake Style
Follow me you LGBTQ+ revolutionaries!! “Come on you sons of bitches, do you wanna live forever?”
Investing In America
Here’s another good reason to invest in Donald Trump’s America. Why? Because John Deere has just expanded it’s product line to include its new SJW Removal tools. Even the smallest community will need at least one. Deere claims the new equipment has proven cost effective and, they note, it never needs hay.
Forget the Chalk – Gimme the Doh
Trump Play-Doh Safe Space Deraignment Syndrome (TPDSSDS) has be born. See. Donald Trump is creating even more new jobs before Inauguration Day. To solve the TPDSSDS crisis, you gotta have Therapists, and ‘binky’ washers, and safety pin distribution experts, interventionists, and coddlers, and grievances communicators–But wait, there’s even more. You have to Expert Media Consultants to be talking heads on cable….
Liberal Conversion Device
We’re not specifying what, exactly, to which Liberals are being converted. Guesses, anyone?
#Whiners – Getting Ready for Trump’s Inauguration
All of Hill and Jill’s and Bern’s snowflakes are stocking up on riot ‘binkies‘ so they can show up in force to disrupt Donald J. Trump’s inauguration festivities. I can’t wait to see Donald’s ‘ Gray Panthers ‘ put the melt to Hill’s snowflakes.
Make America Steak Again
With a little more effort the only thing California will grow or produce is Mexicans. Forget about cows (Beef, It’s What’s For Dinner) ’cause “California’s New Cow Fart Regulations Totally Stink“.
“This bill curbs these dangerous pollutants and thereby protects public health and slows climate change,” said Gov. Jerry Brown said in a statement when he signed the bill in September, against the wishes of the state’s farmers.
The law won’t stop cows from farting, of course, because cows are notoriously disrespectful of human-passed laws. Instead, it will make life more difficult for dairy farmers in California.
California used to be the land of “fruits and nuts“, but with their penchant for regulations it’s soon going to be the “land of sand and sagebrush”. And Mexicans.